Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

WOMEN

It’s International Women’s Day, my friends — celebrating, honoring, supporting, protecting, empowering, uniting, and championing every woman on the planet. But to reach every woman…we have to start with JUST ONE GIRL.

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so sick of goodbyes

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a happy man

For the past month, Gregory and I have been on an absolute Sparklehorse jag — listening to practically nothing else. Yesterday, we even had a long conversation about Mark Linkous and the genius that he brings to his art. We … Continue reading

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a proud heritage

Little-known Muff Fact #698: I am one quarter Filipina. That’s right, mein lieblings — my grandfather, Gaudencio Viloria, was born in Manila and kept a severed goat’s head on a platter in his gottdamned refrigerator at all times. His own … Continue reading

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truth

“It’s rare in Hollywood to get the chance to work on something that you actually care about. The tragedy of the place is all these talented people trying to get excited about stuff they themselves would only view at gunpoint.” … Continue reading

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into the great wide open

Muffy waited ’til she finished high school. She went to Hollywood, got a tattoo. She met a boy out there with a tattoo, too. The future was wide open.

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AMEN

“If we were in the 17th century, you don’t think he’d be a pirate? All the guys in Motorhead are pirates. He’s Captain Hook.” — Alice Cooper, waxing poetic about Lemmy Kilmister of Motorhead. When this movie is FINALLY fucking … Continue reading

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coot-scootin’ boogie

Sorry about the lag-time in my regularly scheduled barrage of profanity, mundanity, and insanity. I’ve been dealing with some hideous and insistent plumbing problems — both the house’s and MY OWN. Yessiree…going to the Doktor de la Vagine later this … Continue reading

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write, quite write…ya bloody well write

I am absolutely THRILLED to hear that I’ve provided the inspiration for a BALLBUSTIN’ DAME character in a brilliant writer friend’s novel-in-progress. Can’t wait to read the finished story. God, I hope she’s a whore.

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cute little bunnies and chickies

This one goes out to all you muthafuckas who think they ain’t seen nothin’ GOOD today.

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