Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

bonafide

Posted on February 28, 2010 by muffybolding

Fred McFeely Rogers; March 20, 1928 – February 27, 2003 Among other astonishing tidbits of wisdom — like, say, a behind-the-scenes look at how crayons are made — Fred Rogers provided me with my very first lesson on how you … Continue reading →

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dr. tony is REAL IN

Posted on February 26, 2010 by muffybolding

The very existence of this video proves, once and for all, the indisputable truth about the MYSTICAL, MAGICAL TRANSFORMATIVE POWERS OF BREEDING. Celebrity Chef Anthony Bourdain was the MOST HATEFUL, MOST DISDAINFUL, MOST PUNK ROCK, NON-FILTER-CAMEL-SMOKING, BUSHMILLS WHISKEY-GUZZLING BASTARD ON … Continue reading →

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get it, donna!

Posted on February 25, 2010 by muffybolding

Histrionic, post-60s teenage Summer romance song…complete with a PERFECTLY coiffed flip. SO fucking good.

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oooooh, cana-da!

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

Yes, we may have kicked their collective ass at Olympic hockey, much to their national horror…but when it comes to providing the most basic human right of access to quality healthcare to its citizenry, we got NOTHIN’ on those FABULOUS … Continue reading →

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librarian

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

Librarian I have loved a hundred men— Traveled the earth, sought them out, perused The cafes, cathedrals, universities, auto Shops, seaports, and hardware stores, acquiring each Of them, a hundred strong, judging none By just his cover. They are catalogued … Continue reading →

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dirty andre

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

“The simplest act of surrealism is to walk out into the street, gun in hand, and shoot at random…” –Andre Breton

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a braying brace of absolute cunts

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

GENIUS! Allan Uthman, the guy who writes this annual hammering of the pricks, is SO fucking brilliant that I was actually moved to send him a fan letter a few years ago in which I told him his writing is … Continue reading →

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a bonnie boy

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

“I doubt I would recognize Lady Gaga if she walked into a room unless she had a wedding cake on her head.” — Stephen Fry I ADORE Craig Ferguson, I adore Stephen Fry, and I adored Tom Snyder and My … Continue reading →

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ah, genius poetry!

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

The reason I like Edna St Vincent MillayIs that her name sounds like a basketball falling down stairs. The reason I like Walt WhitmanIs that his namesounds like Edna St. Vincent Millayfalling down stairs. — David Mamet

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you gotta love winston

Posted on February 24, 2010 by muffybolding

“We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glow worm.” — Winston Churchill

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