Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

somewhere…over the rainbow

Posted on February 17, 2010 by muffybolding

And speakin’ about my mother’s cooter…I want Charlie Sheen and that crack-het he’s married to to have yet another baby they can’t take care of and to call it RAINBOW SHEEN.

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"rainbow sheen" is the name of my new band

Posted on February 17, 2010 by muffybolding

You know how sometimes when you buy pastrami, if you look at it in just the right light it has that RAINBOW SHEEN on it? Yeah. That rainbow sheen is why I don’t eat pastrami. Well, that and the fact … Continue reading →

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in the end, the love you take…is equal to the love you make

Posted on February 17, 2010 by muffybolding

The way I see it, The Beatles were present at both the birth and death of the idea that was the 60’s. If that single, resounding, earthshattering, opening chord of the film Hard Day’s Night represented its jubilant beginnings…then the … Continue reading →

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dave is god

Posted on February 17, 2010 by muffybolding

I have always taught my children that you can find god anywhere — sometimes in the most unexpected places. Wait. Strike that. ESPECIALLY IN THE MOST UNEXPECTED PLACES. For example, when I hear Dave Grohl unleash his thunderous, machine gun … Continue reading →

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wrong, wrong, wrong

Posted on February 17, 2010 by muffybolding

Facebook is just SO fucking wrong on so many different levels. I ask you: would you EVER throw a cocktail party and invite your mother, your boss, your ex-husband’s new wife, your drug dealer, the cousin you made out with … Continue reading →

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mamaphonic

Posted on February 16, 2010 by muffybolding

Mamaphonic book tour. Writers Lli Wilburn, Maia Rossini, Bee Lavender, and Muffy Bolding…at the MIGHTY Atomic Books, Baltimore, 2004.

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oh, the possibilities!

Posted on February 16, 2010 by muffybolding

From the Muffy Bolding “Just Fucking Say What You Really Mean” Files: In old movies, when a man and woman go back to her place after dinner and she coyly tells him to help himself to a drink while she … Continue reading →

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east village awesome

Posted on February 16, 2010 by muffybolding

In December, Gregory and I spent a grand and glorious evening at Bluestockings Books in New York City, listening to Ayun Halliday and Victoria Law (and others) read and discuss zines, feminism, and girl culture. SUCH complete awesomeness was made … Continue reading →

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cardigan resemblance

Posted on February 16, 2010 by muffybolding

From the Inexplicable Life Files of Muffy P. Bolding: Whilst at the MIGHTY Bust Craftacular in NYC in December, NO LESS THAN FOUR separate crafty girls approached me to tell me I look exactly like Exene Cervenka. Other than the … Continue reading →

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knitta, please

Posted on February 16, 2010 by muffybolding

To all our Knittas out there: If you are on Ravelry — and have a knitting obsession, a foul mouth, and a scandalous soul — please join the group founded there by myself, CJ Arabia, and Kimberly Scott — The … Continue reading →

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