you gottdamned right they do


This morning as I was taking my son, Otis, to school, I was thinking about how very lucky I am to be married to My One True Love — which then led to thoughts of what exactly makes a good marriage? Aside from all of the usual criteria we include when compiling a list of what constitutes an exceptional matrimonial match — i.e., affection, communication, compatibility, kindness, likemindedness, trust, lust, etc. — it occurred to me that much of what makes a really good marriage can’t really be quantified. IT JUST IS.

Driving along seemingly endless verdant boulevards lined with ancient Live Oak trees, this realization made me ponder the people in my life who have the very best marriages, the marriages where, even after years and years together, the two of them still take absolute delight in each other’s ideas, company, and accomplishments. Marriages where, even through the most difficult times imaginable, they are still hopelessly devoted to each other and — most importantly — THEY STILL HAVE FUN.

And of all the friends I have and have known, I came up with three couples who are also lucky enough to be married to Their One True Loves, and obviously have a damned marvelous time in the process. These kids are examples to the rest of us as to HOW IT’S DONE, BABY.

I stand in utter amazement, admiration, and joy at the longtime, exuberant unions of my friends Bryan Lee and Cathy Lee; Charles Angyal and Yvonne Angyal; and Paul Stolp and Susan Presley. May you all have many lifetimes together, kids — because, if you’re anything like me and my Cute Jew Boy, you realize that there will NEVER be enough time together in just this one. Mazel Tov!

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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