miss vicki

If the positively stunning Anne Bancroft as Mrs. Robinson and Joan Jett had a baby — and employed Patti Smith as their nanny and Gertrude Stein as their wetnurse — Miss Vicki Abelson would be that esteemed offspring.

She is like a walking, talking, living, breathing, belly laughing reincarnation of those women who, 100 years ago, boldly threw open the doors of their homes, flats, apartments, barns, and bookstores to others just like them – others who craved the passion and communion of THE WORD. Yes, that’s it. Vicki Abelson is like a HOT Mabel Dodge for The New Millennium.

She is that rare breed of woman who is fierce AND talented AND generous of self – a GENUINE triple-threat — which sometimes makes me want to kick her right in the gottdamned taco. But, I can’t. I just can’t. I adore her far too much. She is the gorgeous, cool, older teenage sister that I never had, but always wanted — the one who would secretly take me to buy my first tube of scarlet lipstick, my first box of Tampax, and my first package of birth control pills, and then later teach me how to lie on the bed to zip up my skin-tight Chemin de Fer jeans, French inhale a cigarette, and fetchingly toss my hair just right as I fiercely talked politics, poetry, and rock and roll with the big boys — but yet the same big sister who also stuck copies of Vonnegut, Plath, Fitzgerald, Rimbaud, and Steinem into my hands, with the booming command, “READ THIS.”

As you’ve probably heard and read in publications such as The Los Angeles Times and LA Weekly, an invitation to her literary salon, Women Who Write, is a seriously hot ticket, one for which I had to inquire, tap-dance, cajole, and harass. I think she finally said yes just to shut my fatass up.

Walking into her living room in Montrose for the first time, I felt like I could scarcely breathe. Women, women, everywhere – powerful, intelligent, creative women, all brought together by Vicki, every single one of us poised on the verge of ANYTHING and EVERYTHING.

The ideas fly, words are read, books are born, alliances created, friendships forged. The inspiration, support, and enthusiasm she possesses and freely gives verily sparks from her – and those sparks are contagious, highly-flammable, and have lit many a fire under many an ass. As a writer, I can think of no better gift to receive than this: A seriously hot ass…from the SERIOUSLY hot ass of Miss Vicki Abelson.

So, thank you for all that you do, Miss Vicki. You are a wonder — and one hell of a broad.

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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5 Responses to miss vicki

  1. George Lyons says:

    Damn, that Ms. Muffy woman can WRITE – and all spot on for sure, for sure. Everybody Loves Raymond, but Everybody WANTS Vicki. ❤

  2. Melody says:

    I've never met her in person…but I see her posts on FB, joined her list….and I get these virtual vicki infusions…Yes, she is tres cool, tres chic and so Jewish….I kvell for her Chanel…She probably gets depressed like most of the whack jobs we are, but it never shows. It must drink Oil of Olay…oy vey. Seriously, Vicki, merci for all that you do and muffy, I'll have to start reading your blog, too.

  3. Anna Lefler says:

    Amen! Vicki is a force of nature. She continues to blow me away each and every time I settle my decrepit heinie into one of her folding chairs. What a privilege.Fantastic profile!

  4. Michele says:

    Vicki is amazing! I Just adore her.

  5. Sandra Oles says:

    SO TRUE! GO VICKI! Your writing is stellar, hilarious, and fun!

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