For Our Three Beautiful Babies as they step through to 2011: If you have a dream, don’t let ANYONE or ANYTHING stop you from making it come true. Beware those fearful, envious people — threatened by excellence and the light that radiates from others — who will attempt to thwart you on your journey, by whatever small or petty means possible…by trying to undermine you, devalue you, or even by laying claim to you and all that you’ve done. Just toss them a DAZZLING smile, throw your head back, and BELLY LAUGH in their motherfucking faces — and push onward toward your destiny.
Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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Wow the kids look great.
No time to trade updates?
It’s only been like 10 years. 15.
Still wanna be friends?
oh, my god. what the FUCK, man?? i just heard from your awesome, rotten brother last week! i can’t believe he’s actually on facebook — are you? if not, you need to get your ass over there, son. that’s where ALL the good dirt is to be had. and believe me…I CANNOT WAIT TO HEAR IT ALL.
so, what the fuck is going on, motherfucker? why don’t you email my fatass so we don’t have to conduct all of our bidness out here in the open where every bastard and their brother can read!
muffybolding at gmail dot com