I am a slut.
In fact, I come from a long line of sluts — USO dance hostesses, carnival gypsies, gangster’s molls, and straight-up trollops — broads who would cut your throat just as soon as look at your fucking face. With each beat, my heart pumps their scoundrelous, scandalous blood through my veins every moment of every day of my life, fueling my every thought, desire, and action, and in so many ways defining who and what I am. I move through this world like a man — and I don’t waste time apologizing for it. I take what I want…because it’s all mine. Women like us live life on our own terms, and we can’t be bothered with the petty minutiae of those who would dare attempt to subdue us. We are the Boudicas and the Betty Rizzos of the world, forged in the fierce, felonious fires of discord and want. Tell us we can’t do something, have something, be something…and you got a war on your hands, brother. You cross broads like me and my ancestors and my sisters and my friends at your own peril.
DON’T FUCK WITH US, BITCHES.
WE ARE. WE VOTE. WE RULE.
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About muffybolding
Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
muffy bolding 