Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

tears

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

“Do not fear me, gypsy…all I want from you is your tears.”

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"i adore anyone who adores anyone who adores emerson."

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

A. List seven habits/quirks/facts about yourself.B. Tag seven people to do the same.C. Do not tag the person who tagged you or say that you tag “whoever wants to do it. 1. I absolutely love grocery shopping. I also love … Continue reading →

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leitmotif

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

Words I absolutely live by: “I try to always come from a place of love. But sometimes you just got to break it down for a motherfucker.” — RuPaul

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kicky cut? be gone!

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

Just a quick note to officially announce that I am entirely over this haircut, ladies: Yes, yes, I know, it’s real modern and real kicky and all that…but for me, it’s gettin’ real tired. I understand that just like any … Continue reading →

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strictly horseshit

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

I recently saw The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus and it was in the TOP FIVE WORST FILMS I HAVE EVER SEEN — and trust me, I have seem some bad movies. Aside from the production design — which, like all … Continue reading →

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fresNO

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

KEGGER AT LOST LAKE, BITCHES!

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from the archives: belly laughing in heaven

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

After the recent loss of Bea Arthur — which just about fucking leveled me, I gotta tell you — in reading this post, it has only now fully sunk in that we are losing extraordinary cultural treasures every day. Along … Continue reading →

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i love LA

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

I am currently at Trader Joe’s standing in line behind Michael Gross, the dad from Family Ties, who is a neighbor of mine. I love LA.

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more meme masturbation

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

Yet another self-indulgent list of odd/interesting facts about myself while I fret and sweat with ruinous perfectionism regarding my this-close-to-being-finished book proposal: 1.) From a very early age, I have slept with books in my bed…literally stowed in my pillowcases, … Continue reading →

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sing out, louise!

Posted on January 23, 2010 by muffybolding

“You can uh…you can uh…you can uh…uh…uh — that’s how Burlesque was born. So I uh…and I uh…and I uh…uh…uh…but I do it with a horn! Once I was a schleppa, now I’m Miss Mazzeppa, with my revolution in dance. … Continue reading →

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