Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

doppleganger’s delight

Posted on October 26, 2007 by muffybolding

The ever-insightful, delightful, and inimitable Gabriel () and I were emailing yesterday afternoon and discussing, among other fascinating topics, dopplegangers. Pondering the possibilities, it made me wonder what famous people could aptly represent us in our fantasy biopics…and after much … Continue reading →

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the horror

Posted on October 22, 2007 by muffybolding

Son-of-a-bitch. I completely forgot how to write. Christ, I hate when that happens.

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i was born under a lucky star

Posted on October 22, 2007 by muffybolding

Reason #1 that I love my husband: Because if it turns out there is indeed a heaven…I know for sure there’s definitely a cozy, magical, wondrous corner of it reserved for the amazing men who love, protect, provide for, and … Continue reading →

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orangectomy rex

Posted on October 22, 2007 by muffybolding

My mendings itch. There is nothing to do. I shall be good as new. — Sylvia Plath, The Stones So, this is what the other side looks like, eh? Right, then. Let’s do this. First off, please allow me to … Continue reading →

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benign…

Posted on October 2, 2007 by muffybolding

Greetings, all – it’s the husband again. Just talked w/ the surgeon. Although it’ll take a bit for the official report to come in, he’s confident the tumor was benign and that Muffy is fine. I can breathe again. Thanks … Continue reading →

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entering the tunnel

Posted on October 2, 2007 by muffybolding

This picture represents the whole of my day yesterday: Go ahead…take a good, close look at it, my friends. Won’t you join me in embracing the horror that is my life right now? Yes, that is cherry Jello, Dulcolax, Earl … Continue reading →

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life is a carnival!

Posted on October 1, 2007 by muffybolding

Gosh, I feel like a fucking Make-A-Wish kid! Early Saturday morning, after a treacherous month of being in and out of hospitals, doctor’s offices, imaging labs, and drug stores, Gregory asked what I wanted to do and told me to … Continue reading →

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belly laughing in heaven

Posted on October 1, 2007 by muffybolding

Other than the far-too-early deaths of two of my most influential heroes and inspirations, Gilda Radner and Madeleine Kahn (both, ironically, from ovarian cancer), I can’t remember when the world of funny women has taken such a monumental hit as … Continue reading →

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my day in pictures

Posted on September 21, 2007 by muffybolding

Disease, pain, and the unknown can fuck off, lady. I am delighted and content. How could I not be…with a cozy family, the sound of rain falling outside my window, and a sky over my head that looks like this:

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rawr!

Posted on September 19, 2007 by muffybolding

Reason #17,237 that I adore my husband: Despite the fact that he is a right proper and dignified person — and not generally prone to outlandish public behavior (like his lunatic wife) — when we are out on adventures he … Continue reading →

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