Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

hooray for lizzie!

Posted on July 11, 2006 by muffybolding

From cnn.com: Elizabeth Taylor, who has been thin and not-so-thin, says she won’t starve herself to be like Hollywood’s size-zero starlets. “I wish I could be that size, but I can’t be,” Taylor says in the August issue of Harper’s … Continue reading →

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“shine on you crazy diamond”

Posted on July 11, 2006 by muffybolding

Pink Floyd’s Barrett dies aged 60 Syd Barrett, one of the original members of legendary rock group Pink Floyd, has died at the age of 60 from complications arising from diabetes. The guitarist was the band’s first creative force and … Continue reading →

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lex luthor is a total and complete piece o’ ass

Posted on June 29, 2006 by muffybolding

What you need to know about me: I LOATHE superhero movies — absolutely abhor them. I would rather light my fucking hair on fire than go see like a Spidey or an X-Men or any of those other ridiculous, NO-talent … Continue reading →

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BFF

Posted on June 24, 2006 by muffybolding

A few days ago, I wrote my best friend, Satania, an email…letting her know that I have finally, finally, finally — after four long years — been officially diagnosed. Last night I got back the following response: Stinky, I am … Continue reading →

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bloody fucking brilliant

Posted on June 8, 2006 by muffybolding

Sometimes a good public shaming is all that’s needed to break it down for a motherfucker. Goddamnit, but I do love the internets.

Posted in categories can suck my dick | 4 Comments

ganked from miss

Posted on May 22, 2006 by muffybolding

HA! In the dark ages, how would muffybolding die? You would be lured into a gingerbread house and eaten by a witch. ‘How would you die in the dark ages?’ at QuizGalaxy.com

Posted in categories can suck my dick | 12 Comments

the rest of the story

Posted on May 19, 2006 by muffybolding

Yes, of course, she was mortified and upset that she was photographed almost dropping her baby on his head on the street: But apparently her mortification only goes so far; she seemed just fine with wearing this abomination whilst sashaying … Continue reading →

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unfuckingreal

Posted on May 18, 2006 by muffybolding

Britney Spears stumbled on her way out of her hotel on Thursday afternoon while trying to make her way through a throng of paparazzi and onlookers. She was juggling a glass in one hand and baby Sean in the other … Continue reading →

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i don’t write ’em…i just report ’em

Posted on May 18, 2006 by muffybolding

I never liked this hooker anyway. I’m totally “Team Linda.” From Dlisted: Paul McCartney issued this statement about his separation to Heather Mills: ““It’’s been suggested that she married me for the money and there is not an ounce of … Continue reading →

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meme ganked from

Posted on May 17, 2006 by muffybolding

Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with 6 facts about yourself. In the end you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs. 1) The bandaged dressing on my … Continue reading →

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