Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

“Every blade of grass has a mother goddess that bends over it and whispers, “grow…grow…grow…”

Happy Mother’s Day to all of those extraordinary mothers whom I am proud and privileged to call my friends. You are consistently an inspiration to me as I mother my own babies. Thank you most of all for that. In … Continue reading

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update

Work Thing: Ongoing Disney Channel stuff and the research for a screenplay that will be so gottdamned brilliant it’s killing my fatass just to think about it. Also helping write and put together a “Furnace” presentation (actually, a “sizzle”) for … Continue reading

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eddie and the cruisers goes ape

Michael Pare’ expertly and graciously doing the Monkeyface for me on the set of “Furnace”, Old Nashville State Prison, February, 2006: So fucking ALL.

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memememe…

YOU CAN ONLY TYPE ONE WORD. NO EXPLANATIONS. 1. Yourself: Bellylaugher 2. Your Lover: Brilliant 3. Your Hair: Feeney 4. Your Mother: Diva 5. Your Father: Beatnik 6. Your Favorite Item: Babywipes 7. Your Dream Last Night: Chihuahua 8. Your … Continue reading

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mmmm….

This entry brought to you by… and the letter “M” Miniatures: I am obsessed with all things small — and always have been. The vast majority of my dreams and daydreams before the age of about 13 involved something to … Continue reading

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a gut like a quonset hut

Please forgive, and indulge me in yet another quick query on my continuing quest for an escape from this quaking quagmire of flesh in which I currently dwell. Weight Watchers. What say you?

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unfuckingreal

Okay, you know you have officially become an Angeleno when, after seeing a Del Shores play at The Zephyr, you duck over into Canter’s Deli…and eat a late supper of a Reuben and matzoh soup whilst sitting five feet away … Continue reading

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progress

The one great thing about my hair is that it grows unbelievably fast. Therefore, it is with much pride and satisfaction that I now announce that I have officially graduated from a fat Paul McCartney: to a fat Shirley Feeney: … Continue reading

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the drag queen and miss emmy

This evening, one of my oldest and dearest friends, Peter Garcia, won an Emmy Award for his writing on the PBS-Kids series, Jakers! The Adventures of Piggley Winks. Peter and I, along with Billy, have been mates since we were … Continue reading

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query

Has anybody out there had any experience — either positive or negative — with OA? I am not altogether sure that it would be right for me as, though I certainly adore and enjoy good food (and fucking how!), I … Continue reading

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