Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

anne

Posted on March 18, 2015 by muffybolding

UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE. It has been SEVENTY YEARS this month since this EXTRAORDINARY young woman left this world a much richer place by having honestly chronicled her short, gorgeous, tragic life while she was here. She only got 15 years — but … Continue reading →

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babies of mine

Posted on March 17, 2015 by muffybolding

Inane Muff Fact #7268: Two of our three children, both girls — Betsy and Annie — were conceived, four years apart, within the cozy, twee, charming, faux-snow-covered walls of this Swiss Chalet-themed motel in Anaheim, California…just mere steps from THE … Continue reading →

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happy dagger

Posted on March 15, 2015 by muffybolding

You know, I don’t like to think of myself as a KINGSLAYER. I prefer the term “FIRST-CITIZEN STABMASTER.” I believe very fervently in community-building, so let’s all come together, Mein Poppets. ALL ARE WELCOME to take a stab at it. … Continue reading →

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goils

Posted on February 14, 2015 by muffybolding

My BRILLIANT, BEAUTIFUL sisters — Miss Nadya Ginsburg and Miss Selene Luna. I LOVE THESE BROADS WITH ALL MY FAT, BLACK HEART. There are MANY Framilies in the world…but, goddamnit, THIS ONE is MINE. ‪#‎framily‬  ‪#‎realfuckinladies‬ ‪#‎TRESFIERCEBITCHES‬

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truth

Posted on February 12, 2015 by muffybolding

Mmm-hmm. Thas right, you dumb triflin’ muthafuckas.

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girls

Posted on February 10, 2015 by muffybolding

And, while we’re on the subject of GIRL POWER.

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you can’t handle the truth

Posted on February 9, 2015 by muffybolding

Inane Muff Universal Observation #722: When you have cherished married friends who are separated…there is one surefire way to definitively know that either one or the other has officially lawyered up and filed for divorce: SOMEBODY’S FACEBOOK SUDDENLY and INEXPLICABLY … Continue reading →

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her

Posted on February 9, 2015 by muffybolding

If there is ONE THING that bewilders and confounds me, it is women who will occasionally do what I call, “Bumping Up Against Me” — a quick cultural coup-count/test joust to see if I will compete with them for Queen … Continue reading →

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dv

Posted on February 9, 2015 by muffybolding

After randomly reading about her whilst still a teenager growing up in Fresno, California…looking back now, from the perch of A Certain Age, I can say with all certainty: SHE CHANGED MY FUCKING LIFE. Because of Miss Diana Vreeland, I … Continue reading →

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la

Posted on February 4, 2015 by muffybolding

“If you’re in it to win it…you just gotta stick with it. Through the good times AND through the bad times.” To enter this shitty, shifty, glittering arena and do battle with the most clever, creative, beautiful, talented, ambitious people … Continue reading →

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