Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

hero

LET IT BE KNOWN. ‪#‎fiercequeenschangedtheworld‬ ‪#‎knowthem‬ ‪#‎honorthem‬  ‪#‎speakofthem‬ ‪#‎celebratethem‬ ‪#‎rememberthem‬

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women

THIS. ‪#‎supportthem‬ ‪#‎believeinthem‬ ‪#‎championthem‬  ‪#‎defendthem‬ ‪#‎celebratethem‬ ‪#‎dontcompetewiththem‬ ‪#‎ilovemybroads‬ ‪#‎theyknowwhotheyare‬ ‪#‎allgirlstothefront‬ ‪#‎empoweredwomenempowerwomen‬

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ricky

ALL HAIL RICKY GERVAIS. ‪#‎this‬ ‪#‎shittalker‬ ‪#‎truthteller‬  ‪#‎churchescansuckit‬ ‪#‎payupbuttercup‬

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gratitude

YES. ‪#‎gratitude‬ ‪#‎savior‬ ‪#‎mensch‬

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bubbles

Gives a HOLE new meaning to the phrase, “Artsy Fartsy.” ‪#‎rennaissancelactoseintolerance‬

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and then there were three

Holy shit. WE’RE ADORABLE! ‪#‎jackie‬  ‪#‎muffy‬ ‪#‎parker‬ ‪#‎casitadelcampo‬ ‪#‎andyesirealizethatcomparedtothesetwoilooklikeatubbytrollunderabridge‬ ‪#‎fuckitgirlsjustwannahavefun‬

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change

The more you know. ‪#‎pubicserviceannouncement‬ ‪#‎poopooundies‬ ‪#‎boilthatdustspeck‬ ‪ #‎rottensquathopintheasparaguspatch‬‪ #‎whyarecatsfollowinyou‬

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framily

Those who read me around here and are at least quasi-familiar with my usual garbled warblings have most likely heard me make mention of something I refer to as “Framily.” FRAMILY is a concept, a construct, a core group of … Continue reading

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ol’ jesus

Now THIS is how ol’ Jesus would have done it. Not with disgust, judgment, exclusion, and hate. But with celebration, acceptance, inclusion, and LOVE. ON TRACK. ‪#‎jesushchristifjesushchristcamebackrightnowhowmuchwouldhefuckingloathechristians‬

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balentime

This is SO true. ‪#‎everyonegotonefromeveryone‬ ‪#‎exceptiusedtosavemybestoneforericshowers‬ ‪#‎sodideveryothergirlinclass‬ ‪#‎4thgradewaslife‬ ‪#‎wewereallinthisshittogether‬

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