Author Archives: muffybolding

“The assumption that I agreed by mere birth to your so called ‘social contract’ and to your entire body of ancient and useless laws designed primarily to deform my character and limit the possibilities inherent to my essential being is … Continue reading →

Did you know that “Yoga” is the Sanskrit word for, “I can smell my own vagina”?

“Don’t make money your goal. Instead, pursue the things you love doing, and do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off you. All the other tangible rewards will come as a result.” — Miss Maya Angelou

Fuck it. I give up. No matter how much or how hard I study, I CANNOT for the life of me tell Zooey Deschanel and Katy Perry apart. Has anybody DNA-tested these bitches? This is a goddamned OUTRAGE.

If you enjoy TALKING SHIT — and frankly, if you are one of MY degenerate friends, how on earth could you NOT? — then you need to get your fine ass on over to Casita del Campo in Silver Lake … Continue reading →

“Knitting is the saving of life.” — Virginia Woolf

I am blissfully sitting at a salon…watching my gorgeously eccentric, intellectual, 16 year old son, Otis, get his hair cut into a Mohawk. There’s not a single, solitary moment of my life that doesn’t rock. Even when it gets hard … Continue reading →

“Dogs’ lives are too short. Their only fault, really.” – Agnes Sligh Turnbull

The title of the first #1 single from my new band, “Fatter Than Gladys”: Jackie Beat Can’t Hold Her Mud.”

Don’t know much about history. Don’t know much biology. Don’t know much about a science book. Don’t know much about the French I took. I don’t know much, but I DO know this: I’d rather be a Socialist than a … Continue reading →