Category Archives: categories can suck my dick

My name is Muffy Bolding…and I am a yarn snob.

For Mother’s Day a few years ago, along with a priceless poem from my teenage son, I was gifted with two drop-dead gorgeous necklaces and a pair of earrings (all garnet — my faviest of faves), an entire legion of … Continue reading →

This dress exacerbates the genetic betrayal that is my legacy.

I was unexpectedly contacted last year by a charming young woman who told me she really loved my work — particularly my poem, “Librarian.” She also asked very sweetly if I had any other poems or essays of mine that … Continue reading →

From the SWELTERING Summer of 2006: Earlier this week I spent four fabulous days on location in Orlando, Florida on a television shoot for Disney. First, please allow me to say that it was my very first time there and … Continue reading →

If history teaches us nothing else, it teaches us that Rasputin really needed to wash his ass. It also teaches us that he was hung like a Budweiser Clydesdale. He sought god, but found only Russian perma-frost peasant poon-tang — … Continue reading →

Once again…from the sweltering Summer of 2006: The very best part of being on location (well, aside from the coke and hookers — and snorting the coke off the asses of the hookers) is staying in luxurious hotel rooms. Ah! … Continue reading →

Every once in awhile, the lines blur and the standard rules fall away. Race, class, economic status, athletic genius, and world renown matter not in the least — along with the fawning adulation by annoying white pricks who, only a … Continue reading →

From the sweltering Summer of 2006: For my birthday on Monday, my friends took me to Downtown Disney in Orlando for treats and eats. The treats came first: I got a Sleeping Beauty playset (complete with The Prince, Maleficent, and … Continue reading →

From the Muffy Bolding “Just Fucking Say What You Really Mean” Files: In old movies, when a man and woman get back to her place and she coyly tells him to help himself to a drink while she goes and … Continue reading →