I POST A PICTURE OF MY FAT SELF IN MY BATHING SUIT ON FACEBOOK FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE…and then THROW BACK MY FLORIDA EVANS NECK AND BELLY LAUGH LIKE A JACKAL.

……………………………………………………………..

Think back to high school.

Think back to your absolute MORTIFYING, HUMILIATING TERROR at the prospect of putting on a bathing suit and walking out into a backyard filled with your classmates, all the most beautiful people in your small world. You are 15 years old, always on the outside, from one of the most notorious, felonious families in town, invited by mistake to their cool kids BBQ and pool party.

Now, flash forward to the exact same scenario several decades and several lifetimes later.

Only this time…IMAGINE THAT NOT A SINGLE FUCK WILL BE GIVEN THAT DAY.

And imagine the absolute liberation that you would feel, wearing that bathing suit and that DGAF attitude as you sashay out into the backyard, with nary a towel or coverup to offer you refuge.

HERE I AM, MOTHERFUCKERS.

And imagine, all the things that you no longer need to drag along on your journey — worthless fear, insecurity, and shame — all stripped away like scales off an old dragon, revealing the beauty of the PERFECT IMPERFECTION that lay beneath them…the perfect imperfection that they safely hid and protected for so many years, every scratch in your patina now a badge of goddamned honor.

Now, imagine having the time of your fucking life.

I’m not afraid of anything anymore.