A couple of weeks ago, Gregory and I were lying in bed watching “Woodstock”, the documentary — and although I tried my very best to get into the spirit and the beauty, I was just not getting anything either stardust OR golden up in this motherfucker. All I could see were vast legions of undulating white people with greasy hair, filthy iceholes, and ZERO FUCKING RHYTHM — although ol’ spastic Joe Cocker definitely rocked the living shit out of With A Little Help From My Friends.
I get that it defined a generation and all…but, ultimately, that movie just makes me want to go baby wipe my undercarriage.
Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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