Author Archives: muffybolding

About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

IMPORTANT REQUEST

Posted on June 26, 2004 by muffybolding

First of all, my most fervent apologies to those whom I owe correspondence; I have been out of town on film-related work and have been busy and distracted as a motherfucker. So, if you have not heard from me recently, … Continue reading →

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my darling sire

Posted on June 20, 2004 by muffybolding

Happy Father’s Day to the most extraordinary father a dame could ever have. I love you, Daddy. Tommy at 23 Tom at 63

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i cannot believe my fatass figured out how to do this

Posted on June 15, 2004 by muffybolding

Who’s been commenting in your journal? 1 muffybolding 282 comments 22.87% of total 2 beelavender 86 comments 6.97% of total 3 sophistimicated 39 comments 3.16% of total 4 owlmother 38 comments 3.08% of total 5 monkeysaurus 35 comments 2.84% of … Continue reading →

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this one’s for

Posted on June 15, 2004 by muffybolding

….who makes me belly laugh out loud with her tales of substance ingestion and fine Southern mud. TOYOTA REMOVES PEYOTE SCENES FROM WEB PROMOTION White House Drug Office Calls Online Ad Work ‘Offensive’ June 14, 2004 By Jean Halliday DETROIT … Continue reading →

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it must be all them homos what’s gettin’ hitched out there in frisco. yeah, that’s it.

Posted on June 11, 2004 by muffybolding

The end of yet another sacred heterosexual union…due, almost certainly, to the matrimonial transgressions of those infernal faggots: Rush Limbaugh Ending His Third Marriage LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – Conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh said on Friday that he and his … Continue reading →

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excluding po bronson and bee lavender…

Posted on June 10, 2004 by muffybolding

WORD. “There is no denying the fact that writers should be read but not seen. Rarely are they a winsome sight.” — Edna Ferber

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beastie the riveter

Posted on June 4, 2004 by muffybolding

So, now it seems that along with the recent talk of reinstituting the Draft, the Festering Forces of Evil are also considering drafting young American women into the military, as well. Sure. No Problem. I’ll tell you what, Herr Bush. … Continue reading →

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for some occasions — there simply are no words…

Posted on June 3, 2004 by muffybolding

“Yeah, it’s real nice to see that the MD telethon has come so far in 50 years. Jerry’s still parading the little black kids out here to tap-dance for us…” — Co-host Don Rickles (the motherfucking Viceroy of Irreverence), after … Continue reading →

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crafty academic bastard

Posted on June 3, 2004 by muffybolding

Of the over-100 marvelous people on my lj friends list — this specific result was quite literally the most hilarious and absurd that could’ve come up. And, it did. I must say, I have not belly laughed this heartily in … Continue reading →

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predicted it would become a meme — and he was right…

Posted on May 26, 2004 by muffybolding

TV Guide recently put out a list of the top 25 cult shows EVER. Boldface the shows that you like or have ever liked. 25.) Freaks and Geeks (never seen it…) 24.) Absolutely Fabulous (This show is what RULING THE … Continue reading →

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