Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

chester

Posted on July 8, 2004 by muffybolding

So, yesterday Billy and I were sauntering through the Circuit City in Silverlake. Billy had spontaneously and exuberantly decided that what I really needed in this life was a TIVO — and that he was gonna be the one to … Continue reading →

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boy

Posted on July 8, 2004 by muffybolding

And speaking of top shelf pussy — if I ever put together a band, that’s what it would be called: Top Shelf Pussy. Although…coming in at a very close second would be “Too Many Uncle”, whose background story goes a … Continue reading →

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her first fucking mistake

Posted on July 8, 2004 by muffybolding

Ah, the folly of youth! Pop princess Britney Spears is refusing to sign a pre-nuptial agreement before she weds fiance Kevin Federline, because she’s “marrying him for love and not money”. According to American website Pagesix.Com, the singer’s parents are … Continue reading →

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curiouser and curiouser

Posted on July 7, 2004 by muffybolding

Greetings and salutations, my sweet children of the corn. Yes, I am still in LA, working my little typing fingers to the bone — but just wanted to quickly inquire: Anybody heard from Miss Bee since The Great Expate Exodus … Continue reading →

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real swanky

Posted on July 2, 2004 by muffybolding

What I need you all to know is that I have a big meeting with Disney execs this afternoon — and when I walk in to pitch them my brilliant ideas for possible television shows…I will be wearing a thrashed … Continue reading →

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wow. who knew?

Posted on July 2, 2004 by muffybolding

Who reads your LJ the most? LJ Username Biggest fan stillnominivan This cool quiz by KwizBiz – Taken 15831 Times. New – Kwiz.Biz Astrology and Horoscopes

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sigh…

Posted on July 2, 2004 by muffybolding

Vaya con dios, My Extraordinary Friend.

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circle

Posted on June 29, 2004 by muffybolding

This day, June 29th, 2004…my beloved father-in-law passed from this world at 1:45 am — and through the gorgeous, powerful portal that is my sister, Jennifer, my niece, Isabella, stepped in at 12:27 pm. At this precise moment, I am … Continue reading →

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the four right chords can make me cry

Posted on June 29, 2004 by muffybolding

And I have been crying non-stop. Though I have not spoken of this before, my beloved father-in-law has been quite ill. He was diagnosed with prostate cancer ten years ago, but due to a highly experimental treatment he was receiving, … Continue reading →

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bring it

Posted on June 27, 2004 by muffybolding

“Hook me up a new revolution, ‘Cause this one is a lie. We sat around laughing, And watched the last one die.” — Dave Grohl, “Learn to Fly”

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