Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

sipping kin

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

Here in my hometown of Rochester, New York…interviewing kin, taking copious HILARIOUS notes, and drinking coffee out of the same HEAVY restaurant cup that my immigrant great-grandfather, Augustino Cipro, used to use as a shaving mug in the early part … Continue reading →

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kin

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

The Voyagers, The Vulgarians, The Dreamers, The Degenerates, The Intellectuals, The Grape Stompers, The Matriarchs, The Mafiosos, The Pagliaccis, The Pimps, The Pastry Masters, The Gangster’s Molls, The Gardeners, The Grifters, The Shitkickers, The Thieves…The FEARLESS Raiders of The New … Continue reading →

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milk

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

My LOVING, MAGNIFICENT, MAGICAL Great-Grandmother — Maria Torromeo Cipro — a fierce, proud immigrant from Italy who helped supplement her little family’s income by serving as wet-nurse to several neighborhood children whose own mothers were unable to nurse them for … Continue reading →

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kiddles

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

Rochester, New York: November 2014. Liddle Kiddle brooch straight outta my childhood jewelry box. Whenever I wear it, FULLY elegant and dignified women of A Certain Age come unhinged at the mere sight of it…and then LITERALLY threaten to knock … Continue reading →

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everybody was so young

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

100 Lifetimes Ago…in Fresno, California. Muffy Bolding: Teenage Bride. With the most loving, wonderful Baby Daddy in the world. When asked to describe my marriage, I always used to say…it was like Divine married Richie Cunningham. Even young and dumb…I … Continue reading →

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like buttah

Posted on November 24, 2014 by muffybolding

This is my sister, Mo, age 5 — in a red shirt, red knee socks, white cotton chonies, and hand-me-down brown suede saddle shoes with replaced white laces — showing what a BIG GIRL she is by hanging from just … Continue reading →

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happy place

Posted on October 5, 2014 by muffybolding

Inane Muff Fact #633: When I am feeling despondent, bewildered, frightened, or in pain and need to close my eyes and go to “My Happy Place”…one of the places I go to is the living room of Guy and Rosemary … Continue reading →

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ms. spell

Posted on May 17, 2014 by muffybolding

Inane Muff Fact #517: I live in random, exquisite, obsessed, perpetual, inordinate, inexplicable terror of misspelling “misspelling.” In fact, I just double-checked the correct spelling of “misspelling”…and am now going to hit “post” — but not before I check the … Continue reading →

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THIS

Posted on May 7, 2014 by muffybolding
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i love mimi pond!

Posted on May 7, 2014 by muffybolding

“Muffy and Mimi, sittin’ in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.” HOLY SHIT, I LOVE Mimi Pond! First it was me and Miss Mimi at a FULL NAKIE Korean Spa in Downtown L.A. along with my brilliant muse, Helena G. Harvilicz — and now our next … Continue reading →

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