Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

on track

Because sometimes you just gotta take it OL’ SCHOOL.

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over

‪#‎knitterplease‬ ‪#‎done‬ ‪#‎dunzo‬ ‪#‎fin‬ ‪#‎ovah‬ ‪#‎fuckoffnow‬‪#‎alltreacherousoldbroadstothefront‬

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storm

Raging Muff Fact #666: The Catholic Church once told me to shut my mouth when I fiercely and angrily confronted them about the atrocities committed against my beautiful Mother when she was still a child. They laughed, told me to … Continue reading

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rage

I received a comment this morning that my posting this meme on my wall a few days ago was making an unfair blanket statement about one group of people and that it was out of line. My response: Good Morning. … Continue reading

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as if

Knitter PLEASE. AS IF. ‪#‎fiercewhoresdonthangwithbores‬

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penn

Goddamn, I love Penn Jillette. I would swaller his BRILLIANT OGRE LOG in a heartbeat.

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babies

Because sometimes the desire for the cozy warmth of a heating pad on Mama’s bed OVERRIDES any ongoing sibling rivalry issues. ‪#‎missvivian‬ ‪#‎misspearl‬ ‪#‎deliciousfritosbaking‬  ‪#‎thosearebabies‬ ‪#‎therearemanybabiesintheworldbutthesetwoaremine‬

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werd

WERD. ‪#‎goddamniamgonnamissthisguy‬‪#‎therewillneverbeanotherpotusascoolashimever‬ ‪#‎hrc2016‬ ‪#‎imwithher‬‪#‎alwayshavebeen‬ ‪#‎alwayswillbe‬ ‪#‎girlstothefront‬ ‪#‎oldbroadstothefront‬‪#‎whatthismotherlovingcountryneedsmorethananythingisawisecounciloffiercegrandmothersrunningit‬ ‪#‎myfatassissoin‬

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15

15 in 15 “The Rules: Don’t take too long to think about it. Fifteen authors (poets and playwrights included) who have influenced you as a reader, writer, thinker, and person. List the first fifteen you can recall in no more … Continue reading

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oddball

“Why don’t you knock it off with them negative waves? Why don’t you dig how beautiful it is out here? Why don’t you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?” — The BRILLIANT Oddball, “Kelly’s Heroes”

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