My youngest daughter, Anne, and I were hanging out this afternoon, belly laughing and reciting lines from “Bridesmaids”…and at some point we touched on the subject of fear — and I told her, “If I could give you only one gift of wisdom from all my years spent on this planet, it would be this, Young Baby Goat: Fear is WORTHLESS. It’s a waste of time. FEAR NOTHING. FEAR NO ONE. KNOW HOW POWERFUL AND ASTONISHING YOU TRULY ARE. NO ONE knows any more than you do. Go after ANYTHING YOU WANT — because you can have it. MOVE THROUGH THIS FUCKING WORLD AS IF YOU OWN IT — BECAUSE YOU DO. IT’S ALL YOURS FOR THE TAKING, sister — ALL OF IT.”
She beamed that amazing Baby Goat smile at me and said, “I already know that, Mommy — because you taught me.”
At 20 years of age, this delightful little creature already gets what it took me a goddamned lifetime to learn. She TOTALLY gets it.
If I dropped dead right this second…I would do so knowing that my life was an utter success.
Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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Muffy I’ve been enjoying all your posts since I subscribed to you blog, but this one is hands down the most inspiring things I’ve heard. Brava. Happy New Year.
gosh, thank you, miss denise — you have made an old hooker’s day! happy new year to you, as well! xoxo
I agree! As hard as it is to admit, this is much better than any blog about any dead writer or breathtaking brooch! Viva le Baby Goat!
VIVA LE JINXIE BEAT! i love you, miss! xoxo
Indeed Muff Meister! We are all just as smart or as stupid as the next guy and none of us have a lock on ANYTHING.Oh, and what a beautiful girl you have…she adopted?
why, you rotten motherfucker…
(I ADORE YOU, DEWAYNIE LINK! HAPPY NEW YEAR, MY BRUTHA!)
A motherfucker yes, rotten….no, I’m fresh.
If I were to ever get a tattoo, your words would be on my ass.
I dig you like crazy.
I must sit at your feet soon.