folly, indeed

“I am the beautiful reflection…of my love’s affection. A walking illustration…of his adoration.”

Just an Old Trollop spending a DELIGHTFUL Summer afternoon playing dress-up in the BRILLIANT private movie memorabilia collection of a MOST CHERISHED friend. Yes, an ancient whore running amok amongst the hats, dresses, and jewelry once worn by several amazing legends of the big screen…including this get-up which was featured in the infamous Ziegfeld Follies, “His Love Makes Me Beautiful”, wedding number in which Miss Barbra Streisand as Fanny Brice unexpectedly reveals not only her delicate feelings of matrimonial love…but her DELICATE CONDITION, as well.

And no, Mein Poppets, this is not some clever set-up to announce that I am expecting, which would, of course, be a biological impossibility since my Girlie Bits got ruthlessly GANKED some two years back.

I am definitely NOT pregnant — though according to the nice older lady at the grocery store yesterday who smiled sweetly at me, laid her hand on my tummy, and excitedly asked me when I was due…apparently I JUST LOOK LIKE I AM.

I smiled sweetly back at her in return…and scrunched my nose up and answered, “Labor Day. Can’t wait!”, and then, holding my head high, marched off into the produce section in search of cucumbers and kale.


About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.
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