Author Archives: muffybolding

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About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

from the archives

Yeah. This is how we do it in Bucharest, baby: MonkeyFace Totem-Pole…Romanian style. Because he always plays the serious-as-a-heart-attack heavy, nobody has any idea how hugely hilarious he is. The Jackals and I have been routinely doing the MonkeyFace for … Continue reading

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bravo!

It was announced today that one of my favorite living poets, Charles Simic, was named the 15th poet laureate of the United States by the Librarian of Congress. Speaking as a writer and a poetry fanatic, I find this news … Continue reading

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lifted from the talented and inimitable

Every once in awhile you stumble across something that reminds you just how awesome it is to be a member of the human race. For me, this is one of those times. Stuff like this proves that EVERY single person … Continue reading

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ha! gregory’ll get a kick outta this

muffy — [adjective]: Smells like teen spirit ‘How will you be defined in the dictionary?’ at QuizGalaxy.com

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me and the cute piglet

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mmm…meme

Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following. They have to be real places, names, things…nothing made up! Try to use different answers if the person you ganked this from had the same first initial. … Continue reading

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author, author!

And one more…because I just cannot bear not to. If you don’t think this song is about as ALL-talent as it gets…then go fuck yourself, my friend — you got no bidness around these parts. “If you’re after getting the … Continue reading

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wistful

Christ, I miss Joe Strummer.

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happy birthday, cute pig!

Well, Happy Birthday, yesterday! I was too busy having fun hanging out with you to post your birthday wishes in a timely fashion, so I am doing it now. In our world, fun always comes before duty! Happy Birthday to … Continue reading

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steam heat

If I could ask the Universe one question — one genuinely sincere question from the bottom of my heart — it would be this: Why can’t it be global cooling, goddamnit? No, seriously. Why can’t it be? My god, how … Continue reading

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