Author Archives: muffybolding

Unknown's avatar

About muffybolding

Muffy Bolding is a mother/writer/actor/knitter/feminist/withered debutante who likes the smell of asparagus pee, and remains obsessed with the bathroom hygiene of her three children -- despite the fact that they are 23, 19, and 16. She is blissfully married to a cute Jewish boy who looks like Willie Wonka, but remains tragically in love with the dead poet, Ted Hughes. She has the mouth of a Teamster, and her patron saint is Rocco (pestilence relief.) Ms. Bolding lives in Southern California, where she enjoys typing words, making movies, and plucking the rings from the fingers of the dead. She was the co-creator and Editor-in-Chief of the award winning satire zine, Fresno Lampoon, and in between writing screenplays, carnival barking, and savagely threatening her trio of darling larvae with a wooden spoon, she currently publishes the zine, "Withered Debutante." More of her work can also be found in the anthology, "Mamaphonic: Balancing Motherhood and Other Creative Acts", the compilation zine, "Mamaphiles III: Coming Home", as well as in The Cortland Review and hipmama.com. She is currently writing and producing for film and television, and working on a book of essays entitled, "Inside A Chinese Dragon." She has slept around, but not nearly as much as she would have liked.

devine

Posted on September 25, 2012 by muffybolding

Just got the following comment posted on my Facebook wall by the glorious and glamorous Damon Devine…about my behavior last night at The Abbey: “I saw Muffy last night, wildly knitting like Joan Crawford during the filming of The Women. … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

amazing

Posted on September 23, 2012 by muffybolding

Just finished watching The AMAZING 64th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards with Gregory and the chihuahuas and there are a few things on which I would now like to report: 1) So, call me a cunt who holds a grudge…but no … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | 4 Comments

diana

Posted on September 23, 2012 by muffybolding

My god, how I ADORE THIS WOMAN. And, OF COURSE she was a Leo. Knitter PLEASE. “Elegance is innate. It has nothing to do with being well dressed. Elegance is refusal.” — Diana Vreeland

Posted in categories can suck my dick | 1 Comment

milla

Posted on September 23, 2012 by muffybolding

I ADORE HER. “I am a strong Ukrainian girl, that is why I work a lot.” — Milla Jovovich (Photographer: Peter Lindbergh. Vogue Italia September 2012)

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

margaret

Posted on September 22, 2012 by muffybolding

TESTIFY, MY SISTER! “Woman must have her freedom, the fundamental freedom of choosing whether or not she will be a mother and how many children she will have. Regardless of what man’s attitude may be, that problem is hers — … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

reason to believe

Posted on September 22, 2012 by muffybolding

I woke up this morning thinking about an old childhood friend, Janel Davis, whom I have not seen in years and years — and remembering how much our adolescent selves worshipped Rod Stewart. We would sit on the grass at … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

keep your eyes on me, stay together NO MATTER WHAT…and RUN

Posted on September 19, 2012 by muffybolding

Oddly enough — though actually not THAT odd if you really think about the delightfully sodomitic circles in which I cavort — I am one of the very few in my close cadre of friends who has children. Though, in … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

j to the c

Posted on September 19, 2012 by muffybolding

My guess is that if ol’ Jesus were to come blasting back amongst us today — all piercing blue eyes, great bone structure, and stinking homespun robes — he wouldn’t think much of the vast majority of those who profess … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

this man IS a god

Posted on September 14, 2012 by muffybolding

EGREGIOUS PRIVILEGE MARGIN CALL, MOTHERFUCKERS: “Yes, the long war on Christianity. I pray that one day we may live in an America where Christians can worship freely, in broad daylight! Openly wearing symbols of their religion…perhaps around their necks. And … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment

this is how you do it

Posted on September 5, 2012 by muffybolding

As someone who is fortunate enough to have been mentored, acknowledged, encouraged, and championed by a series of FIERCE, BRILLIANT women in my own past, and who has, in turn, passionately committed herself to helping other women recognize the SHEER, … Continue reading →

Posted in categories can suck my dick | Leave a comment