Category Archives: categories can suck my dick

My awesome daughter, Anne, AKA “The Baby Goat” and Nick, the son of one of my oldest and dearest friends, Kirby; Los Angeles, December, 2010. Kirby and I were both pregnant at the same time and yes, we BOTH breastfed … Continue reading →

Look what your rage, horror, revulsion, and disgust over my latest Facebook status update caused, Miss Ayun Halliday. THIS IS YOUR FAULT. YOU DID THIS. There are frantic, traumatized Hoosier housewives running rampant throughout the state — having shotgun-stress-diarrhea in … Continue reading →

YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS. That’s a MOGWAI and a POSER and a SWEET-LIPPED BABY GIRL! Mama LOVES YOU, Miss Pearlie Mae!

Ever since I was an odd, tiny lass growing up in Fresno, California, I have frequently seen things in my head that would eventually come to pass, and I know, without a smattering of doubt, that my life is going … Continue reading →

Wall Street Crocheted Yarnbomb Graffiti. COMPLETELY ON TRACK.

Muffy’s Humbling & Astonishing Hollywood Moment #223: Sashaying the aisles at Fresh and Easy with Miss Jackie Beat, BELLY LAUGHING, breaking each other’s balls every five, pilfering yummy food samples, and then, when using the automated scanner to ring up … Continue reading →

Merry, Merry, Mein Poppets! May your day be grand and your New Year be DELIGHTFUL, ASTONISHING, ENLIGHTENING, and LUCRATIVE…and filled with ADVENTURES UNENDING. With love…from me. xoxo

Three delightful Pork Rinds. I will gnaw on every single cute buttcheek in this picture. No. Seriously.

I’ve noticed that when interesting, stylish women hit about 40, they inevitably get themselves a gimmick. Carrie Donovan, Lynn Yaeger, Anna Wintour, Vivienne Westwood, Betsey Johnson, Fran Lebowitz, Grace Coddington, et al. Distinctive spectacles, vivid hair, costumey clothing. The message: … Continue reading →

One of my most festive and favorite holiday traditions is going to Tiffany and Co. the week before Christmas…and seeing all the boyfriends and husbands dutifully lined up out the door and around the block like soulless robots, each terrified … Continue reading →